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29 June 2010 ... Working as a Flight Instructor at South Warwickshire Flying School (SWFS), Wellesbourne airfield (near Stratford-on-Avon). Left to Right, sitting down at front: Rod Galiffe (owner of SWFS), Alan Seeds (Instructor), myself and Ray Stock (Chief Flying Instructor). Behind us are 4 of our RAF cadets. As in previous years, from March to September we teach cadets. |
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Potted
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flying excerpts from Patterns in the Chaos
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Squawks! - actual maintenance complaints logged by Pilots and the replies from the ground Service crews. | |
Pilots snag sheet entry | Ground crew reply |
Test flight OK, except auto land very rough. | Auto land not installed on this aircraft. |
Something loose in cockpit. | Something tightened in cockpit. |
Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. | Evidence removed. |
Navaids volume unbelievably loud. | Volume set to more believable level. |
Dead bugs on windshield. | Live bugs on order. |
Transponder inoperative. | Transponder always inoperative in OFF mode. |
Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. | That's what they're there for. |
Number three engine missing. | Number three engine found on right wing after brief search. |
Aircraft handles funny. | Aircraft warned to straighten up, "fly right," and be serious. |
Weather Radar hums. | Reprogrammed Weather Radar with the words |
SOME RULES OF THE AIR ....courtesy of Clifford. | |
If you pull the stick back, the houses get smaller. If you keep pulling it back they get bigger again. | |
Flying isn't dangerous. It's crashing that's dangerous. | |
The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire. | |
You know you've landed with the wheels up if it takes full power to taxi to the ramp. | |
Helicopters can't fly; they're just so ugly the earth repels them. | |
Always try to keep the number of landings you make equal to the number of take offs. | |
Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, the experience usually comes from bad judgment. | |
Every takeoff is optional. Every landing is mandatory. |